A Day With Apne Aap

February 20, 2013

A Day With Apne Aap

I'm sitting here in the domestic terminal of Delhi airport awaiting our call to board our delayed flight to Kolkata.  It's the perfect time for reflection on the amazing day with Apne Aap yesterday.

Following morning yoga and an opening circle, we headed to an international complex, home to many non-profits including Apne Aap, founded 10 years ago by the powerhouse, Ruchira Gupta.  They have offices in New Delhi, Kolkata and Bihar.   As we waited for a presentation by the director,  Dr. Abhilasha Kumari, we were given a super sweet chai igniting much chatter between the challengers (too much caffeine or sugar perhaps?).  

Apne Aap is an organization whose primary focus is the prevention of at risk women and girls getting into the sex trade.  The other focus (about 20%) is on the rehabilitation of girls/women who've been removed from the trade.  They were quite proud to tell us of the legislation they have before the Indian parliament to:

1.  Make the level of violence against women more visible through civil punishment for pimps, traffickers and brothel owners.

2.  To decriminalize the prostitute and recognize them as victims.

3.  To prosecute the johns/buyers by addressing the question of demand.

Apne Aaps view is that any level of prostitution IS violence against women and that no woman should be bought or sold.  To empower women, teach them about their fundamental rights and give them skills to integrate independently into society is paramount.  They have created 10 assets as part of the process and include:

1.  Safe Houses

2.  Nine Friends-form into groups of 10

3.  Education

4.  Political Knowledge

5.  Self confidence-the ability to articulate publicly

6.  Ability to address authorities

7.  Savings, "inter-loans" and a bank account to give them a mainstream identity

8.  Vocational training and life skills

9.  Legal knowledge, realizing they have rights and what are the laws (i.e, you cannot be bought or sold by any person including your father)

10. Linkage to two government services (food, housing & job cards)

It's basically to teach them how to live within their own lives and the organization is inspired by the Gandhian philosophy of looking at the "last one".  This is the most marginalized child, with most girls trafficked between the ages of 8-14.

All of this was brought into full life with our afternoon visit to a safe house on the outskirts of Delhi in the Najafgargh district.  Our huge bus pulled into the narrow streets and 20 people looking like a small parade, walked to the safe house.  As we approached we could hear this wave of children's voices grabbing our attention as they cheered and waved like crazy.  Entering the house, we were welcomed with a blessing of a tikka (red dot on the forehead) as we shook countless little hands to the sounds of "Hello!  How are you?  What is your name?".

Cramming ourselves into a small, pink room, we sat on the floor and were welcomed.  We then had a chaotic tour to the sewing room and computer room, before being herded back into the small pink room for chai and veggie samosas.  Proceeding onto the roof of the safe house, we were part of a celebration of exuberance.  Bollywood type music playing, some of the young girls would stand up and dance (a choreographed number), lip syncing throughout.  They encouraged us to join us with it ending in a huge mosh pit of jumping, clapping, dancing and ultimately smiling faces.

One of the workers with Apne Aap said that these girls were at high risk of being trafficked with many of their mothers being prostitutes.  Often, they would have evening clients and wouldn't get home until the morning, leaving the girls to look after the housework and drop out of school.  As they danced, with pure joy on their faces, I commented how happy they seemed.  She replied, "this is the only place they can dance as they want, do things as they want.  It's their place and they have no such opportunities at home."  I commented, "so, this is the place where they can be children."  To which she shyly smiled and said, "yes".

Seeing the Apne Aap structure in action, offering children insight, knowledge and options was truly heart expanding and hopeful.  It felt that through supporting the work of Apne Aap that we ARE making a difference.  That these kids might know something besides the life of a prostitute.

As we left to shouts of "Bye  Didi" (auntie/big sister), many hugs and waving hands, you could sense the uplifted mood of all of us.

Amidst such poverty and challenge, we witnessed light.