Being Embodied

Our bodies are incredible despite the self-talk that desperately and unconsciously tries to deny how amazing they are. So often in my thought of the week I focus on moving beyond the boundaries of the physical to see if we can dis-identify ourselves from how we look and what we can or cannot physically do in order to tap into the deeper essence of who we are.  Yet without this physical body how would our souls experience the multitude of lessons it's exposed to within a lifetime?

You may have heard the saying, "Are we physical beings having a spiritual experience, or are we spiritual beings having a physical experience?"  The tradition of yoga would lean toward the latter, that our evolving souls come into a physical manifestation in order to continue learning what we need to know.  It's taken me years to wrap my head around this thought and part of being a seeker is to question what this means.  

In the beginning my physical was all there seemed to be.  I was an active child, curious, adventurous and fearless, often resulting in my body having stubbed toes, banged up elbows and dirt on my neck. Everything I connected to was in a strong physical experience through play, athletics and competition.  As I became identified with being a "good athlete", the connection to the body became even more important, so much so, that an injury would send me literally tumbling into wondering who I was if I wasn't a gymnast or a dancer or a softball player or a soccer goalie or a tennis player or a track and field athlete?

For reasons that I'm still exploring, at some point along the way, I began to look beyond my body and to the other lessons I was learning about who I was.  Part of this questioning blew into my world when my father passed away when I was 19 years old.  That tailspin of grief took me out of my body to facing the world with other questions of "what's the purpose of life?" and prompted me to act quickly as you just never knew when your time would come. And now some 30 years later, it has begun to make more sense that no divide exists between all of it...body, mind, spirit.

I now see that the many layers of who we are exist like a huge cable made of our different threads weaving together our unique complexity: our body, how we act, what we think and how it reaches out and affects everything else. If one of these threads is denied or under/over utilized, we are thrown out of balance.  We are not alone or separate in our own selves just as we are not alone and separate from all else in the world and beyond.  Our amazing bodies aren't simply bio-machines that need only food, water, air, safety and sleep but, indeed, house all of the experiences from the moment of conception to our last breath.

We travel the often magical and bumpy road of life to embody our own life and what it means.  When my Dad passed away, I embodied the feeling of grief and clung to its darkness for 24 years before it moved into a form that no longer sent me over the edge. Falling in love for the first time and then breaking up sent a physical and sobbing pain into my actual heart, but taught me how to feel my emotions.  Finding my beloved Ed has taught me what it means to be deeply committed to and supported by another person.  The many injuries suffered over the years taught me how to understand other people's pain and how to be in our body even when it's not 100% well.

Being in this amazing body has taught me gratitude for ALL that I can experience.  As I become more mindful I slow down, connect with breath, surrender and share these ancient teachings and my own embodiment deepens.  I thank this body that is not only my temple, but my lab, my teacher and mine for this lifetime.

So I conclude with two questions:  What has your embodiment taught you?  Have you thanked your body today?

Time For A Time Out

My memories of kindergarten include toting a napping mat with me to school. Mine was red on one side, blue on the other with a white piping around the edges. It wasn't that thick but I wasn't that big so it really didn't matter. What did matter was that when it was time to rest the mat is what dictated my own personal space. When our quiet time finished we all sat around drinking milk and having graham crackers. What a life! 

Unfortunately that behavior wasn't encouraged much after kindergarten and off we were, launched into the ever active, scheduled and goal-oriented world. Nowadays times-out have become a way for parents to manage naughty behavior. When I was a kid, it wasn't called a time-out it was, "Jaynellen! Go to your room!" Once there, I would chill out until I felt it safe to show my face and join back into family life. Mind you it didn't happen that often (or so I care to remember it that way).

In our current cultural realm we navigate our daily lives as though we are guiding a boat over a lake with threatening rocks lurking just below the surface. If we become careless or mindless or move too quickly, we run aground and possibly stop our forward momentum. So we don't stop...we just keep moving, plodding along through our to-do lists as we hear the pinging of our appointment reminders. But what would happen if we stopped?

My thought for the week is: how much can you slow down in your current life? Do you need to? What happens to you if you overpack your schedule? Do you begin to let go of the things that are supportive of you, such as exercise, making healthy food choices, getting sleep or having down time? What do you sacrifice in order to stuff more stuff into your day? At what point is it no longer beneficial to how you intend to live your life?

I ask these questions for two reasons.  One is because I observe and listen to many clients throughout the week who have hectic, full days. The second is that I'm about to have a full weekend off, my first in about a month and feel like I am bordering on the edge of fatigue.  Similarly, when students come walking into a class asking, "Is it time for Savasana?" (Sha-Vah-Sana - or final relaxation pose, the final pose at the end of a class), it's fairly evident that it's time to do less, draw inward and slow down.  Writing about it reminds me that it's as important for me as it is for everyone else.

One of my teachers, Judith Hanson Lasater asks the question, "What would the world be like if everyone did savasana for 20 minutes a day?". My question to you is, "What would YOU be like if you did 20 minutes of savasana a day?".

I hope this has given you a little inspiration to head into your storage area and dig out your old kindergarten mat. And then, maybe grab some graham crackers and milk. Now that's a worthy time out!

Through Thick & Thin (and even a little rain)

Perhaps it's not until you are tested that you realize how your practice of yoga and meditation can be a lifeline.  Perhaps that sounds a bit dramatic but during our recent tennis tournament we were put to the test of how to remain calm and carry on. Two things are for certain, rain and tennis don't go together in the desert.Considering that we are in a serious drought here in California, I usually feel nothing but gratitude for skies that open up and bless us with rain but with 750 tennis players waiting in the wings my wish was that it was raining anywhere else but on the tennis courts. As we well know, wishing never had much pull with Mother Nature. So, it rained on two of our nine days of play...not all day long but enough to put a kink in the smooth running of the schedule.

As the rain fell the stress levels rose.  A contingency plan needed to be erected, matches needed to be rescheduled, tennis clubs not usually involved in the tournament needed to be called to see if they had dry and open courts.  Players for the ASICS World Tennis Classic came from 28 different states and from Canada. They've invested in travel and accommodation as well as the time spent preparing to play in a highly competitive event.  In short, they were here to play and we were doing our best to make that happen despite the wet weather.  Needless to say, with the amazing skills of Ed, not only my husband but the tournament director, along with our second in charge, Sheryl, they worked their magic and made it happen.

We've had this tennis tournament for 10 years and every year I learn something new.  This year I was reminded of how important my morning practice is to supporting me in keeping an even keel.  I was reminded to focus on the things that I can control and to let go of those I can't (like the weather). Although I had to get up 90 minutes earlier than usual, I did. Stepping into my meditation space sets the tone for everything else that will unfold that day and what I've learned over the years is that when I'm in a better space, more grounded and connected, I can be more present, compassionate and focused for all the people that I come face to face with during the day.  

Being an introvert, I fill my tank by turning inward rather than outward. The need for this goes up during the tournament as not only do I see some 270 names and faces each day, I continue to teach a few yoga classes throughout the week.  My tank empties like gasoline in a Hummer-quickly!  Stepping into solitude and settling my thoughts, I ask myself to be fully present with all beings I will come into contact with...this is my practice.  I know that being in my practice, no matter what is happening is vital for me to be able to be present, through thick and thin.

A saying exists that says, "You should meditate for 20 minutes each day, unless you're too busy, then you should meditate for an hour". Being busy isn't a reason to neglect what supports us.  Are we too busy to take even a few deep breaths? Too busy to let go of tension in our shoulders?  Too busy to find quiet moments?  Too busy to be grateful?  I know it's challenging and often it feels as though something is constantly tugging at us for our energy and attention. But I also know that by ignoring what serves and supports us, will drain our battery sooner or later.  Uncovering what supports us will come into play throughout our life and having a ritualized and regular practice can be key to when things get rocky.  

Begin now, no matter what is tugging at you---pause, take a deep breath, even close your eyes and just pay attention to the sounds around you.  One breath at a time, through thick and thin and even a little rain!