Almost 14 years ago, I returned to live in the United States having lived in Australia for 17 years and gaining Australian citizenship. Before meeting my now husband, Ed who was living in Melbourne, I had no intention of returning to the USA as I was a fully assimilated Aussie. I have had the repeated experience that life can be somewhat unexpected and this was no exception. We often have our compass pointed in one direction that seems to be completely under our control and then..."whammo", we get bumped off course with our bearings nowt pointing us toward an unfamiliar place.
Prior to leaving Australia, I had a vision of my feet being buried ankle deep in Australian sand. I had felt grounded and connected to the place and here I was, choosing to up-root and return to the place where I had spent my childhood. It seemed like an adventure, I was seeking to create change in my life, but if someone had handed me a ticket back to Australia in those first few weeks of being back in the land of the free...I might have just taken it.
Without fail, my heart feels a bit achy as I board my return flight back to the States, wondering when I will once again, place my feet on Aussie soil. Now this all sounds a bit sad and melancholy, but things have shifted for me over the years of going back and forth between the two countries. I no longer hold that dreadful feeling of loss and uncertainty. I now feel completely at home in and connected in both countries.
An expert in cultural diversity and a friend of mine says that I am now a "bi-cultural" person having a feeling of equilibrium in both countries. In saying that, I feel a contentment that I thought I might never hold. I recognize and have gratitude for the uniqueness of each place, for the different circles of friends that I'm connected to and the ever expanding network of professionals that grow from my business in both places. Now that all sounds neat and tidy...it's not. It's taken over 30 years for this evolution. In the past 15 years it's been supported by my own personal growth and commitment to my practice of yoga. It's a result of listening to my sometimes seemingly silent inner voice, asking me to listen, trust and act.
As I have been challenged through my life of "having a lot of energy", I have found it difficult to sit quiet and listen. But, as I say to my students, the elements of our yoga and meditation are just that...a practice. We step into that space on a regular basis with an intention of committing to deepening our own awareness and self-inquiry. I know that have at greater sense of ease as a bi-cultural citizen has been made easier through these practices. The reason is that I have more peace within myself. So no matter what soil my feet have landed upon, I find myself at home.
I hope we have the opportunity to sit and practice together soon!
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