I've recently embarked on a year-long mentorship program studying Shamanism and connecting more deeply to my own soul. I've been interested in deepening my knowledge of this for the past three or so years and, as a result, part of my opening to this path is to pay attention to the signs and symbols the Universe shares with me. The theme this week arose from three separate conversations I had with people with whom I am close. Within all three conversations, I kept hearing the same message. All three in varying forms were experiencing hard challenges within their intimate and close relationships and, although they didn't use the same language, they were more or less saying the same thing. Somewhere in loving, serving, and supporting the beloveds around them, they had lost their way. And in all three conversations, I basically reflected back to them that perhaps the message is to look after themselves and fill up their empty and hurting hearts.
Another experience that led to this theme was over the weekend when we held a huge fundraising effort at my yoga studio to support the Australian wildfire relief efforts. It was a magical day with four different offerings including yoga, meditation, and Kirtan. Our community near and far showed up to participate, either as a student in class, a roadie, a foodie, a greeter, a donor or event manager. People contributed significant amounts of money, brought their energy and skills, and gave their time to make the day a huge success.
The final session of the day was a beautiful yoga Nidra practice. I had a mat set up for myself to do the practice, but came in late, hesitantly, as I was in the foyer "looking after stuff and checking that all was okay". Thankfully, a wise and quiet voice inside said, "Go into the class and lay down"...so I did. As I settled onto my mat, I noticed my breath was uneven and I could feel my heart beating. It felt as though the day's adrenaline pumping through me was still trying to find something to do. It was at that moment, that I heard a deeper message to come back into filling up my own well.
Over the past month, Desert Yoga Therapy and its community have raised over $15,000 USD for three different charities. Part of our mission is to serve others...open-heartedly and regularly. Service is a keystone to what we do and at the end of our fundraising day, I said to myself, "OK...enough for now". I have been asking so much of our community in the way of giving and they've responded in the most humbling and hopeful ways. And I know from past experience, that in order to not experience "compassion fatigue", we all need to look after what we need individually in order to continue to serve unconditionally and compassionately.
Hence, the theme of the week is to come back to yourself and fill up your energetic heart. It's time to ask, "What is one thing I can do that will connect me into my inner sacred space?" It doesn't have to be a massive shift or undertaking. Maybe it's something as simple as leaving five minutes earlier than you normally would in order to travel in a less hurried and stressed-out state. Perhaps it's working on being more comfortable in your own company. What can you do for yourself, that nourishes you deeply but doesn't involve other people or distractions?
A story I've been sharing throughout the week is that sometimes when my husband is driving and I'm the passenger, the petrol gauge is hovering over the E (empty) symbol. I ask him, "How much further can we go?" and he'll reply something like, "Oh, we've got about 3 miles left in the tank, we can make it" at which time I begin to launch into a small anxiety attack, stressing about the potential of running out of gas. Eventually, we glide up to a pump, fill up and continue on our way.
The metaphor is that so often, we sit with our tank hovering on empty and silently say to ourselves, "I can do a bit more, I can make it." My thought of the week is that we don't have to wait or push ourselves in order to test our limits to see how far we can go. Giving ourselves time for self-care isn't selfish but instead self-loving. When our tank is full, we can more readily turn around to serve those we love and care about. And if you are empty, know that turning the focus back onto yourself and filling up your well of giving is one of the kindest things we can do for ourselves and others.
Practice begins within and consistency is the key. Now...I give you permission to take some time for yourself and I will endeavor to do the same.
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