Giving Unconditionally

Have you ever given someone a gift, done them a favor or sent them a card and then heard nothing in return? Nadda...zippo...zilch. Not a word. How does this make you feel?



Typically in our culture when we give something to someone else, we are taught that it's polite to say something such as "thank you" in return. A non-response can leave us wondering if the person received what we sent and if so, why they hadn't acknowledged it.



Yoga teaches us about giving in a slightly different way. It's called SEVA or selfless service. When we attach an expectation to giving it can lead us toward disappointment particularly when we aren't acknowledged in return. The practice of seva goes deeper than giving and receiving. It's a simple practice of just giving. The giver offers a service and the act of giving is enough with no expectation of a reply.



It's a practice that teaches us to open our hearts, let go of expectation and feel what it's like to simple do something or give something to someone else. I'm not saying that this practice tolerates ingratitude, but it shifts our motivation for giving to just that...to give. If we can offer some aspect of ourselves to someone in need, or out of love and not bristle if that's the end of it, then we are stepping into the practice of unconditional giving.



This idea relates to last week's topic of holding space for someone else by being an attentive listener. Can we offer to listen without the lure of fixing the other persons problem or offering unsolicited advice? Can we make a donation at a charity event and not expect to get a goody bag in return? Can we let go of our attachments to words, items, time or even sharing our lunch by giving these freely away?



When we are in the practice of service, it has the potential to fill a deep need- to feel appreciated and helpful to others. It's to offer support in a way that doesn't have a monetary value connected to it. It's as though the act of seva teaches us to be rewarded by the act itself and not the resultant outcome.



Find some way this week to put yourself into selfless service. It may not put food on your table, but it will be a feast for the soul.