It's Contagious

Last weekend I had the privilege of studying with my teacher and 48 or so other students in Berkeley, CA.  In doing so, I caught flights to and from the training.  And although I could write this weeks thought around the topic of a dysfunctional S.I. joint (sacra-iliac in the lower back), instead I was given inspiration whilst waiting for my flight back to Southern California.

I flew Southwest Airlines from Oakland and for those who haven't experienced this airline it goes something like this...you are divided into boarding groups  (A, B & C) and by numbers.  As we were waiting to board, all clustered in a waiting area seemingly too small for the number of passengers, I couldn't help but notice a family with two young kids.  They garnered my attention because the young boy (I'm guessing around seven years old) was getting in trouble.  He was being scolded by both his parents who were telling him to "stand still", which seemed to be quite the challenge for the young boy.  And he wasn't told quietly just once, but harshly in hushed tones a few different times.

The family tussle seemed to die down when I next looked up only to observe that the father who had been chastising his son for "moving around" was standing, wiggling, fidgeting, shaking one leg and chewing on his fingernails.  The fathers' nervous energy was highly contagious...his son had caught it.  But like many contagions, you don't often notice that they're being spread.  Finally, the family pre-boarding call was announced and the puddle of twitching moved onto the plane.

I sat there thinking about the disconnect so many of us experience between our actions and what is reflected back to us.  It was as though the fathers' energy (in this case) was transmitted on a cellular level to the son, yet the father had no idea that he was modeling this behavior and was even more agitated at his son for being agitated!

So, you may be asking, what does a twitchy father have to do with yoga?  The answer...awareness.  What we say, how we move, what we think create the wave of vibration that echo out from us.  If you want to feel more peaceful, surround yourself with peaceful people.  If you want to dance uninhibited, head to a rock concert.  If you wish to be inspired, hang out with inspiring people.  If you want to feel the end of the world is near, watch the news.  If you want to watch your own reactions, head to a yoga class.

What we expose ourselves to is the energy we absorb.  And the energy that we project is detected by everyone we come into contact with.  We don't need to speak the same language to send out good vibrations...a sincere smile resonates loudly in any culture.

If part of the reason you practice yoga is to find a sense of inner connectedness and calm, then you need to be in the vicinity of that quality, whether it be from the environment, animals or other people.  The energy that surrounds us is contagious, so elevate your own sense of awareness to fine tune the vibrations that you wish to penetrate your life.

For the agitated father, I wanted to suggest taking a deep breath and try to release any unnecessary tension being held in the body without spewing it out over his own child.  But, in that moment, that wasn't my purpose.  It was simply to remember to pay attention to my own choices and reflect out the ones of how I wish to be in the world.

Peace, love and happiness is what I'm shooting for...

Get Comfortable

Have you ever had the experience of walking into a dinner party, yoga class or social gathering and seeing someone you've been trying to avoid?  You sit yourself at the furthest point away from the person, perhaps avoid eye contact, or roll out your mat next to someone who you love chatting to.  It's human nature.  We move away from things that make us squirm and move toward things that make us feel comfortable, whether it be people, situations or facing thoughts such as grief.

One of the underlying principles of Buddhism is that all beings suffer.  As we come to realize this as truth, we can begin to move away from the suffering by becoming more comfortable with the idea that it may still be present.  In other words, given that suffering is present, can we alter how we react in the face of what makes us uncomfortable?

This is definitely part of many yoga practices.  Just think of how many times the instructor has put in that double pigeon hip opening pose on the day when you'd rather simply ignore your hips.  The teacher gently coaxes you towards making friends with your hips, yet your hips would rather be walking out the door.  How do we find ease when our physical body is telling us that it would rather take a nap than be uncomfortable?  Or when you're sitting in a peaceful meditation and a leaf blower begins roaring outside your window.

We become more comfortable with the uncomfortable by simply acknowledging that we're uncomfortable.  Then we surrender.  By letting go of the associated tension that comes with the unwanted, we begin to offer a space for potential ease.  We connect to a slow calm breath.  We notice if we've transmitted tension to some other part of our body away from where the main thrust of the pose is occurring.  We invite ease by opening the pathway to do so, rather than turning in the opposite direction and running away from it.

When we start to find more ease through what physically challenges us, we hold the potential to find more ease in what emotionally challenges us.  Grief is a great example of this practice.  When we have a loss in our lives, whether it be someone we loved, a job that held our identity or a relationship coming to an end, we turn toward many mechanisms to ease the pain.  Drugs, denial, isolation, anger and overindulgence are examples of trying to side step suffering.  When we begin to realize that we are in the process of grief we can begin to offer ourselves choices of how we might react.

Much of this begins with showing compassion for ourselves in our loss.  To understand that our grief can be expressed in many ways and through the journey of learning to deal with our loss, we need to hold ourselves gently.  It's giving ourselves permission to simply grieve and to perhaps communicate to others that this is how it's manifesting itself.

By stepping onto our mats, or off our mats into the world of the unknown, we can practice becoming more comfortable with the unfamiliar and uncomfortable challenges we face.  Being on your yoga mat is a great place to start this practice.  All you need to do is to roll out your mat, kick off your shoes and step on.

Off you go...

Let's Meditate

I was so excited this week to receive a link to an article entitled "Meditation boosts genes that promote good health" (click here).

It began with:
"Feeling run-down? Try a little chanting, or meditation - seriously. Such relaxation techniques can boost the activity of genes involved in several processes beneficial to health, and they only take a few minutes each day to show results."
Wow!  So it DOES work and here's yet another study showing how beneficial a relaxation, contemplation and/or meditation practice can be for us on many levels of body, mind and spirit.  Of course this is affirming news as I am approaching the eight year anniversary of my seated meditation practice.  Not only do I feel personally virtuous for keeping with my practice, but now I know that the chances of having longer telomeres is real!
So what is it that keeps us from sitting on the cushion every day?  Studies such as the one mentioned above abound.  We know it's good for us, yet sometimes it seems next to impossible to find the time.  Or when we do it, it feels unsatisfying because our thoughts can be rapid fire and overwhelming, how will we ever get this under any semblance of control?  Aren't we supposed to STOP THINKING?  Yikes!

On my most recent yoga retreat, the question was asked, "so when will it feel as though I've reached my goal in my meditation practice?".  My answer was simply, "There is no goal to be reached.  Our intention is to simply learn how to be present with what is.  We practice observing whatever might be arising in our experience, rather than taking purchase with our thoughts.  We see them come and go, without trying to judge, control, alter or stop any of it." 

In the moments where we notice that we've grabbed onto a particular thought and have followed it into either the past or future, or the "what if" scenario arises, is when we use simple tools to come back to the present.  Bringing our focus onto our breath or a mantra can anchor us back into the present moment.  Try chanting Om Mani Padme Hum (om man-eh pod-may hum), "the jewel in the heart of the lotus", 108 times and see how much else you can think about.  It's as though the tools are like someone holding up their hand to say STOP...and so we do and come back to the present.
One of my teachers once said that once you establish your meditation practice and you miss a session, it will be like leaving the house without having brushed your teeth.  And so it has become for me...part of my daily morning ritual.  It sets the tone for my day and anchors me into my deeper self.  I can set my intention, check in with that inner voice and witness what is circulating in my awareness.  It's as though it's my first appointment for the day and allows me to be ready to hold the space for all of the other appointments to follow.

One last reflection is worth sharing.  Your meditation practice is just that.  It's yours and it's a practice.  It's a personal experience that you can create any way that serves and supports you.  You have nothing to prove to anyone else and although many techniques exist for ways to actually meditate, finding what works for you is the right technique.  The one thing that all traditional meditation practices have in common is that it's seated.  Try launching your practice by sitting 5-10 minutes and building up towards 20-30 minutes.  The main idea is to just get to the cushion and sit.

And you never know...your telomeres might just get a bit longer as well!

Time To Unplug

 

 

How much daily news do you get from the TV or radio? How many times do you check your email each day or receive a "tweet"? How much do you engage in playing games on Facebook or solitaire on your computer?  How much time do you experience silence each day?

My thought for this week was inspired this past weekend during

my annual yoga retreat in Idyllwild.  The intention of the retreat is completely around the practice of unplugging ourselves from our often hectic lives. The idea is to take the residue of retreating into the cooler climes of the local mountains where it's so easy to disconnect and bring it back to our "regular" lives.

Being on retreat is the perfect opportunity to disconnect and unplug. For two full days we put away our cell phones, had no TV or radio. Access to the Internet was discouraged so that tended to limit our time to check on anything other than "urgent" emails. The beauty of having consecutive days of disconnect is that it allows your brain, body and spirit to find themselves in a different relationship to one another. Distractions of our busy-ness aren't given the opportunity to interrupt. Plus, if you add in a daily practice of yoga, meditation, hiking along a mountain trail and watching a sunset whilst dining al fresco, the experience enters a space of potential transformation.

So, how do we then connect to this place of ease and stillness once we return from the mountain top when we have work to do and a schedule to keep? 

My answer is to first, remember the physiological feeling of being quiet and still. When you reach a state of calm, how does it feel in your body?  Where is your calm center located?

Second, create the opportunity to find at least 10 minutes during your day to connect to this inner space. Sit. Breathe. Be. Take a break from watching or reading the news for a few days. Turn off your phone and pick up a good book. Make it a priority...every day.

Stop doing.  Just be.  Even if it's only for a few moments.

Every Day Is Earth Day

 

 

This past week we marked the annual celebration of Earth Day. From a yogic perspective, every day is Earth Day with the practices of yoga evolving from a connection to as well as a reflection of the natural environment. We salute the sun and bow down to the earth, stand like a tree or mountain and recline in a restorative posture named "flowing mountain brook".

With the availability of electricity and artificial lighting, we began to fall out of sync with the ebb and flow of natural light that in the past indicated when to go to sleep and when to awaken. As the earth has become more populated with the development of concrete and skyscrapers, we have lost our connection through bare feet into the earth. And as we live in noisy and busy environments, we often miss the sounds of the natural world. Earth Day is a vivid reminder to honor Mother Earth (Gaia). That we, as humans, walk upon this larger planet with its own living energy. That Mother Earth is here to support us in every way.

Earth Day is another opportunity to reflect upon how we individually impact the planet. What type of footprint are we leaving? Are we able to elevate our own level of consciousness to lessen that impact?  It's appropriate to use the camping/hiking phrase of "take only pictures and leave only footprints".

Here are a few reminders as to how we can continue to show compassion to Gaia and in doing so, we show compassion towards others as well as ourselves.

Tips:
1. Carry your own water bottle to avoid using plastic, one-use bottles.
 

2. Have your own multi-use lunch set for heading off to work, to avoid using one-time, throw away containers. 

3. Remember to bring your own shopping bags to the store. 

4. Check the tire pressure in your vehicle to enhance miles per gallon. 

5. Use multi-use dryer balls in your dryer rather than a fabric softener in the wash or throw away dryer sheets. I use earth-friendly dryer sheets that go, with the lint into my compost. Or line dry your laundry. 

6. Create your own compost for your garden. (and add your earth friendly dryer sheets into it!)
 

7. Buy phosphate-free detergents.
 

8. Turn off your tap when brushing your teeth. 

9. Turn off your computer at the end of each day. 

10....Send in to me any tips that you do in order to be part of the buzz around reduce, reuse, recycle and sustain!

Since I originally posted this list three years ago, we have installed solar energy and bought a Toyota Prius. It all adds up as I want my footprint on the planet to be as little as possible.  

 

Thank you Gaia!

Imagine if...

 

 

This week we are once again reeling from a tragic attack against innocent people.  My thought for the week came from a deep and sad place, wondering if any of the feel good vibes and actions that I've committed to and permeate my life make any difference. 

 

Within that darkness I am yet again drawn to look toward the light.  The light that lies within me and you and potentially all beings that inhabit the earth.  But how?  How do we even begin to shift violent acts towards acts of kindness?  How do we embrace those that are suffering to such a degree that they feel compelled to bring havoc and chaos into not only their lives, but the lives of people they don't even know?

 

I came up with two perspectives.  The first is to turn towards all of those people we know that share the same vision.  To gather as a community and to sound off even more loudly that we stand for peace and love.  That's it.  My being has had enough of hearing how cruelly people act towards other beings.  I'm tired of the battle of violence and want to firmly walk in the footprints of Mahatma Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King.

 

The second perspective is to begin within.  If we ourselves aren't peaceful, if we can't feel or express love, then how can we radiate it out and expect it of others?  Are we not just all mirrors reflecting back to each other.  I yearn to see love reflected back to me.  I beckon to hear kind words spoken to me.  I seek the voice of my inner soul saying 'thank you for looking after us'.  So, I must begin with me.

 

Imagine if today you had the mantra of:

 

Self-care

Self-love

Kindness

 

How have you looked after yourself today?  How have you shown compassion towards yourself today?  What words of kindness has your inner voice been speaking?  Now imagine if that same mantra was that of all of your friends, family and acquaintances, (including all of your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and LinkedIn friends).  Imagine if all of their friends also had that same mantra...

 

What would happen?  What do you think would be the effect?  All I know is that I need to stay firm in my stance to practice love towards all beings, including myself.  I need to hold all beings with a softness, including myself.  I need to speak words of kindness and support to all beings, including myself.

 

Are you willing to stand firm in your voice, thoughts and actions? 

 

Imagine if we all did...

Where Should I Feel This?

 

Over the years working 1-on-1 with people or teaching a class, I often get asked the question, "Where should I be feeling this?".  In the past, I would make a suggestion that if we were stretching our hamstrings that you should be feeling it in the back of the upper thigh, or that if we were doing a spinal twist on our backs, that you should be feeling it in the lower back.

 

What I've come to learn over these many years is what I project or anticipate what someone will feel often isn't the case.  Just the other day I was teaching a semi-private yoga class to four people.  We were doing a pose and I asked everyone, "where in your body are you feeling this?".  Each person expressed a different sensation and location on their body for exactly the same pose.  "I feel this in my shoulder"; "I feel this along the outer hip"; "I feel this in my hamstring" etc.

 

It no longer surprises me to have that response from students.  My theoretical knowledge was different from my experiential knowledge.  Nowadays, my answer to the "where should I feel this" question is, "I don't know.  I'm not in your body so I don't know where you should feel it, only where you might be feeling it".  And I'm not trying to be a sassy pants as I say that.  My "Jayne theory" is that we feel the pose, stretch or exercise in the part of our body that is the tightest or weakest and offers us the most resistance.  Following my shoulder surgery, many twisting poses aimed at stretching the back were strongly experienced in the tissues around my repaired shoulder.

 

On another level of experience, the tribe of Off The Mat fundraisers who were on the trip to India had a post-trip follow-up call describing how we were doing with our re-entry.  Some people were having the experience of isolation and lacking motivation.  Others were already gliding back into their to-do list and ramping up for what's next.  Although we all had shared the trip, our reactions to it have been so different.  How are any of us supposed to feel upon returning from such a journey?  To that, there truly is no "right" answer of how we should feel. 

 

It's an opportunity to simply be with whatever the experience is.  It's a chance to sit in a place of not judging and become a witness to where we feel things, whether it be a yoga pose or a yoga trip.  This is what makes all of us human beings who have basically the same design yet such incredibly diverse and interesting reactions. 

 

So my thought for the week is to release the should in our day and sit in a conscious space of observation...with no guilt and perhaps an insight to wisdom.