Vertical Time

This past year,  a new concept came to my awareness through the spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle, and it's one worth sharing.

If we think about when we are born and follow it to this very moment, we can look back and reflect upon all that has happened.
The result has us sitting where we are, right now, reading this particular blog. Everything in your life, each experience, and sensation, no matter how "good" or "bad" they may have been, has molded you into the person you are in this very moment. If we use this very moment as a starting point and project into the future we may have certain goals and aspirations, none of which have been fulfilled as they are sitting in that space that is yet to unfold. And we don't know how much remaining time we have along this life continuum. This is known as horizontal time...the chronology of our lives which, for many of us, is where the majority of our attention is spent, either reminiscing in the past or projecting into the future.

Now take a moment to simply sit quietly and sense all that you can...what do you hear, see, taste, smell, or touch? When we sit in this state of awareness, we are no longer moving along the horizontal continuum, but are in what Eckhart Tolle calls "Vertical Time", the state of complete presence, bearing witness to our current experience. This often unfamiliar and unexplored state helps us to be fully alive in the present moment which often reveals itself as being completely whole and in need of nothing else.

I began teaching this idea in our Advanced Studies program this past year in the module associated with Yoga for Healthy and Conscious Aging. For so many in our culture, when we sit in the present moment and begin to launch into future thought, it can be wrought with anxiety and fear. How much time do I have left? Do I have financial resources that will support me until the end? Will I be healthy or experience pain? How will I cope with the loss of friends and loved ones? This futuristic thinking can capture a great deal of our energy and attention and in doing so, drag us away from what is actually happening. It's as if vertical time is screaming at us, "Pay attention...You're missing your life!".

The idea of vertical time was amplified on our recent seven weeks of travel in Australia and Bali. Since both my husband and I have been working with the concept of being in the here and now, every once in a while we'd be traveling someplace, discussing future possibilities and travel fantasies until one of us would simply say, "vertical time" to bring us back into being exactly where we were and not drifting off to some imagined futuristic place. It occurred to me that one of the reasons I love to travel extensively is because it encourages me to be in vertical time. Being in an unfamiliar environment, the senses light up and we take in so much more than in our day-to-day routines. The wonders of nature, different and exotic foods, all sorts of smells both pleasant and not-so-much all provide the perfect setting to be fully present. It literally enlivens the senses and challenges our regular internal status quo.

Often when we return from our holidays, we step back onto the horizontal axis of time through the repetition and mundane nature of habitual living. Our practices of both yoga and meditation, even though they might be familiar, provide us with a sense of spaciousness to simply check-in to what's happening, both in our internal and external environments. We sense the experience we're creating through our yoga poses. We connect to the now moment through the simplicity of being with just this one breath. We get quiet and still so that our inner wisdom and inherent intuition can be heard.

A sobering statement that I once heard at the beginning of a guided meditation is that "We're all going to die. We just don't know when." A part of me resisted hearing this, I mean, who wanted to hear about our impending, someday death when all I wanted to experience was a blissful peacefulness? Yet what the statement ignites is a sense of being grateful and present in each moment of the life I'm living. I don't wish to be tangled in the thoughts of what and when something might possibly happen and miss the incredible moment that I'm fortunate to be alive.

Get vertical. Your heart and soul are calling you to do so.

Note: This is my 500th blog post! 

Time For Balance

I'm back in the States and back at work. It's been quite a break for me, not any longer than last year, but quite a different experience. Our trip was ironically book-ended by two funerals, which when experienced with travel and vacation in between, is a powerful reminder of the fragility and preciousness of life. Perhaps it added a sweetness to the experience, bringing the sensations of travel and the unknown into a more vivid experience. Adding to the colorfulness of the trip, our house went into escrow when we were a few days away from returning from Australia. This, in turn, added a layer into the saying of "hit the ground running" which we didn't plan for nor expect.

Needless to say, my motto for the week has been to remind myself to make room for welcoming rest among the chaos.

And what a powerful reminder is before us! The Equinox is happening this weekend-the shift from one season and into the next. We mark and celebrate both Equinoxes and Solstices every three months as they are powerful turning points as well as compasses in our lives. The Equinox is about balance and equanimity with daylight and night hours becoming more or less the same as we sense a shift out of the more extreme temperatures into more mild conditions. The Solstices represent the extremes, longest day and longest night of the year. I think of the Equinoxes as being the more gentle reminders of change, beckoning us to get outside, either for the first time in the spring or for the last few times before winter arrives.

Our last day in Melbourne was spent in the Royal Melbourne Botanical Gardens (a worthy and spectacular place to visit if you're ever in the neighborhood). We could sense that spring was getting primed to burst forth, noticing buds on plants and smelling jonquils, jasmine, and cherry blossoms. And this week in the desert, you can sense a shift simply by looking at the forecast over the next week with no temperatures predicted to pass the 100F (38C) mark. The dragon's breath of summer is beginning to recede, the Harvest Full moon has passed, and the Northern Hemisphere is taking the turn toward the cooler and incubating fall and winter months.

As it relates to the physical practice of yoga, it encourages us to check-in to see if there's an underlying current of energy that is one of ease rather than distress or agitation. In Patanjali's Sutra 2:46, Sthira Sukham Asanam, it states that the "asanam" or posture finds a state of yoga/union when it is both alert and relaxed. Nowhere in the Sutras does Patanjali suggest that we need to push, strive, or struggle during our practice. To me, it says that although we may be challenged, whether it's sitting quietly in meditation or practicing a Warrior Pose, within each of those moments we have an underlying feeling of ease and presence. It can seem quite counter-intuitive as I was always rewarded for "trying hard and pushing through". I was "tough" and that was a good thing, so to back off and not always "do my best" feels uncomfortably unfamiliar.

We all have a tipping point where whatever we're doing is no longer beneficial. Beyond this optimum point, what may have had an essence of ease shifts towards struggle. Our physical structure is like that as well if we push our bodies too hard, the tissues begin to break down. Our practice is an amazing opportunity to deepen our internal awareness or our interoceptive ability, to notice if the ease has gone out of the equation and to once again cultivate its presence.

My thought of the week is no matter what you're doing in your life-a yoga pose, closing escrow on a house, recalibrating your schedule, or taking a driving test that you check-in to see if ease is detectable. If not...back off, take a deep breath, and find that sweet spot!

Adventure

It's been whispering my name ever since I can remember...that small voice that lit my wanderlust. Maybe it's because I was born to American parents in England and was in-utero as we cruised across the Atlantic. I felt the pull to see as much as the world as possible. Apparently, my first camping trip was when I was about three, and we roamed the United States, pitching a Coleman tent and sleeping on cots and in lumpy sleeping bags throughout my childhood. My father, in particular, liked to get out and explore, hiking on trails, spending time at ranger talks and in visitor centers, looking for the wonder that you find being in nature. It stuck as not much inspires me more than looking forward to my next adventure.

The idea of having an adventure can mean different things to different people. Some might be drawn to bungee jumping, whitewater rafting, abseiling or hitchhiking. Those adrenaline-provoking, heart-pounding experiences which are both exciting and terrifying all in the same moment. For others, having an adventure may be on the opposite end of the spectrum-undertaking a new course of study or trying a different food. So what sounds like an adventure to me, might not be the same for you. 

Whatever it is that makes you feel uncomfortable, yet excited at the same time, is your adventure and it's important to find it as often as possible.

Having an adventure means stepping out of our personal box of comfort, stepping beyond our normal boundaries, and experiencing something from a new or different perspective. Traveling the world has given me one major lesson -a broader world view and perspective. When I've been away traveling and return to wherever home might be, my previously parochial view has been altered. It teaches empathy and compassion. It offers an education that can never be taught in any school or structured system. It connects us to each other and to our own selves of self-reliance and curiosity.

To approach something with adventure in mind, go someplace you've never been. It might be something in your hometown that's off your well-worn path, or it might be buying a one-way ticket to some exotic place in the world that you've only ever dreamed about going to. Say "yes" to the inner calling of travel and exploration and try to avoid having to have everything be perfectly in order before you head off. Why delay what you can do now? What are you waiting for?

Some of the most exciting times I've had unfolded without having a firm plan in place. It reinforces the practice of presence. It connects us to meeting our basic needs of food, transport, and shelter and, in doing so, much of the peripheral details of life that we can become overly obsessed about begin to subside. 

I know I will travel for as long as I'm able, particularly reinforced as I bear witness to the shrinking world of my own Mother, who has dementia. An adventure for her might be getting her out for a pedicure and frozen yogurt. As we never know what's next, what I hope is next is my willingness to say yes to the next thing that scares me a little bit and brings a smile of anticipation simultaneously.

I'm packing my big boots. I'm off...to have an adventure and I hope to hear about yours when I return. And to quote Winnie the Pooh:

"When you see someone putting on his Big Boots, you can be pretty sure an Adventure is going to happen."

~A.A. Milne

Delayed

About a week ago, I returned from running my first Icelandic Yoga Retreat-Experience the Midnight Sun! It was a fantastic week, filled with lots of yoga, waterfalls, lava flows, windy beaches, and Icelandic horseback riding. We were fortunate to have a group that jelled and were fun and supportive of each other throughout the week. It was magical...once we all got there! To begin with, my husband and I had a five-hour layover in the ginormous Dallas/Fort Worth airport, only then to be delayed by three hours. I stood looking out the terminal window as the lightning struck the ground and with a sickly feeling in my gut of, "oh...this doesn't look good".

The delay in our arrival meant that we would miss the first half of the first day...a foodie walking tour. As the instructor/leader of the group, I began to feel anxious at the prospect of not being there from the beginning. I began to text my contacts, figuring out the next steps of arranging new transport from the airport and catching up with the group. Once we arrived in Iceland, we hit the ground running, grabbing a pricey taxi to the hotel, dumping our bags and connecting for the final two stops of the walking tour. We arrived...finally...safe and sound, albeit a bit harried.

Unfortunately, another retreater was delayed with a flight cancellation and missed the first day altogether. At the end of our morning yoga practice on the second day, we would be picking her up at the airport on our way to the tour for the day. I suggested that we offer her a big, loving welcome upon meeting. As we found her at the airport, I slid open the doors of the van, jumped out and yelled, "Welcome!" as I gave her a big hug. At the end of the week, she said that this was one of her highlights of the retreat!

The point of these two stories is about letting go of what we can't control. Both of our delays were due to bad weather. Nobody's fault. And, it's about recognizing that our yoga practice really begins once we step away from the mat. What we do in our regular practice is to reinforce and build resiliency so that when life throws us a curve, we are able to steady ourselves sooner rather than later. All of us could have stayed angry at what happened, but instead, the practice showed up. I definitely felt strong emotions of anger and frustration, contributing to being anxious and nervous. As I recognized and felt these sensations in my body, I was able to respond by walking around the airport, laying down and listening to music creating a new playlist, stretching and meditating. Many deep breaths and giving myself permission to let go were also part of the process. It was vital that I personally let go of the more negative energy as to not carry that forward into the retreat once we actually arrived.

It was also interesting to simply people-watch at the airport. We had yet another short delay on our way back to Palm Springs from Dallas/Fort Worth and as I sat waiting for things to get moving, it was fascinating to see how people were responding to things not happening at the time/pace they wanted. It was as though you could see those who had some sort of practice of being present and those who perhaps didn't. Agitation only seemed to accelerate the discontent and, as a yoga teacher, I thought that these moments, although they challenge us, are the perfect moments to practice letting go. 

Our practice begins once we leave the mat or meditation cushion. It helps us to be consistent, building a stronger connection for when life isn't going the way we want it to be. And all of us have had those experiences of being delayed and having to change course, so in some ways, your practice can only get stronger and stronger as life will undoubtedly show up in unexpected ways.

Take a deep breath. Get centered and enjoy whatever the present moment has to offer. That's it...that's all there is!

Serve Others

I love it when something happens that reinforces a previous theme but in a more potent way. This time it was the energy of our most recent Summer Solstice Kirtan, with our small but mighty band - Jayne & The Om Boys. We gather to play music and support a local charity on each of the turning points of the year-two Solstice and two Equinox celebrations. This past weekend, for the Summer Solstice we raised over $1,700 for a local grassroots charity-The Girlfriend Factor. They support women, 25+ to complete their college education at our local universities and community college. And one of the cool things about The Girlfriend Factor is that 100% of the monies raised goes to the scholarship recipients to use as they need, for books, uniforms, childcare...whatever!

The energy of the weekend once again affirmed how powerful it is to serve others. My journey of service, called Seva in the yoga world, began to unfold when my husband and I took our first trip to India. We spent our time visiting sacred sites and well-known monuments, inhaling the complete experience of sensory overload...smells, vibrant and confronting sights, poverty, extreme wealth, honking horns and rumbling trucks. India had reawakened my desire to expand my yoga practice in the form of service, but on my return home, I wasn't quite sure how to go about it. I knew the calling to be of service felt as though it would expand and further extend my intention to live a yogic lifestyle. Known as Bhakti Yoga, a branch of yoga focusing on service and devotion had been calling me. And then...only a few months after returning from India, I came across the Global Seva Challenge with Off The Mat, Into The World. They were raising money and awareness around the issue of sex trafficking in India...my answer had appeared.

So in 2012, I began and as I didn't really know how to begin raising money to reach the $20,000 goal, I turned to my local community and asked for help. Eventually, I raised over $25,000 and took a bear witness tour to India in 2013 with a contingent of others who had reached the same goal. 

My thought for the week is that sometimes we need to place our focus outside of ourselves...as though we need to move our all-consuming personal agenda aside and bring our energy and time to something else, something larger than ourselves. My focus shifted away from me to raising money for people and organizations doing incredibly challenging work in India and I began to become invested in finding and giving voice to young girls who had been silenced. And as I went to India the second time around, I felt as though my entire local community was with me as they too, had invested an incredible amount of energy in helping me reach the goal.

From that time, Seva has continued to be part of my practice and when I opened the Desert Yoga Therapy Studio in December 2016, I realized I could offer whatever I felt would be supportive of our intention to serve as well as offer a safe and sacred place for people to attend. What evolved are four gatherings each year to support our local community and its charities.

I have deep gratitude to the Om Boys who donate their time, musicality, and energy to bringing Kirtan to DYT. Thank you, Ken, Shawn, James, and Oggi. I am grateful to my husband who walks this path with me. And what's more, I am not only stunned and humbled but deeply grateful to our community of generous supporters who step up each and every time donating money, bringing food, and helping set up and break down the event. You inspire me and my heart is full! 

Thank you, Namaste', and Om Shanti, Shanti, Shantihi!

What's Important

It's a simple question...what's important to you? This week, I've been exploring asking that question from three different perspectives. The first is what's important to you in the big, overarching theme of your life? What provides the oomph to move you forward and continues to keep you pointed toward your personal North Star? For many people, it's family, career, purpose, creativity, freedom, optimal health, and feeling secure in life. For me, one of my guiding lights is peacefulness. Does this decision lead me toward or away from finding ease and peacefulness in my life?

The second perspective is, what's important to me in the immediate future, such as in the next couple of weeks? As I contemplate this aspect of the question, I can't help but be drawn to my to-do list, particularly as I'll be undertaking a large amount of travel in the very near future. I'm leaving in a week to run a yoga retreat in Iceland and, in late July, heading Down Under for a good whack of time. So as you might imagine, I have a list of reminders of what would make my life more peaceful if I were to have them off the list by the time I leave.

And the third aspect is perhaps one that gets a bit less attention than the first two and that's, what is important to me now...in this very moment? If I think about the first question of the big picture, I sense the entirety of who I am...my body, my mind, emotions, and my spiritual essence. As I think about the second question of the near future connected to what needs to be crossed off the to-do list, I sense it's more of an intellectual practice, centered in my mind. When I ask the question of "What's important right now?" I drop into the space of my heart and allow intuition to be the guide. It's as though the to-do list doesn't even exist in this moment.

As you reflect on those three questions, notice if they seem to be in alignment with one another and if not, where does the shift need to occur?

My suggestion for practice this week is to spend a bit more energy focusing on what's important right now. Allow yourself to make firm footing in the present moment as all future moments arise from this space. And if we can tap into the deeper inner calling and move forward from that perspective, perhaps no matter what eventuates in the future, it will have an underlying essence of what truly matters to us. 

If we connect to what's important right now, we set the stage for what lies ahead. Trust your inner space and choose from that knowing. Perhaps you'll set yourself up for a more gentle ride no matter how near or far in the future!

Namaste

I'm tired. Yep...I'll admit that this peace-seeking yogini has had an abundant and full season. It happens about this time every year when our peak season comes to an end and I feel as though I've finally poked my head out of my own personal bubble. And when I feel fatigued, my creativity and inspiration tend to wane. I find myself looking forward to re-filling my own well, stepping off the yoga mat for a while in the role of teacher, and do other things that light my fire like travel, walking along endless beaches, and spending time with my beloved and my heart tribe. It's all on the horizon and for that I'm grateful.

This past weekend I went to SYTAR (Symposium on Yoga Therapy and Research) and was pleasantly surprised by my experience.  Upon my arrival, I was dragging my tail and holding little in the way of expectations. And in some ways, I believe this is what allowed the space for whatever I needed to be revealed. 

Along with networking, meeting new people, and reconnecting with familiar faces, inspiration was sparked for not only new yogi-preneurial ideas but within my heart. The primary catalyst came from one of my most influential teachers-Nischala Joy Devi. I first met her back in 2006 when I was studying yoga therapy. It was at the beginning of the residential course and we had just experienced a disappointing few days with an anatomy teacher. Being an anatomy geek, I had high expectations and was in a grumpy agitated mood with my needs not being met.

And then Nischala Joy Devi arrived. It was as though she floated into our presence and I can honestly say it was the first time I had the face-to-face experience with what I would describe as a "radiant being". I was in quiet awe of how evident a lifelong of heart-centered practice appeared in someone. I silently thought to myself, "I want to be that person when I grow up...". Nischala has just released her new book The Namaste Effect and it inspired this week's theme for my class teaching.

I describe the meaning of Namaste as "The light in me, sees and honors the light in you and when we are both there, we are one." This inner light or sense of connection to our inner beingness is beyond our physical body and our thoughts. It's the consistent essence of our true nature that has always been present and will still be present even as our physical and emotional selves change and dissolve over time. The invitation this week is to deeply connect to and cultivate our inner light. If that light is hidden from us, if we have no awareness of it, then how can we possibly recognize it in others? The essence of this light is love.

The light held within the meaning of Namaste has also been peaked with our recent radiant full moon and the Summer Solstice here in the Northern Hemisphere. Nature and the lunarscape are calling us to honor the light in all its expressions. We've been focusing our practices this week on three aspects-the light within us (Namaste), the light reflected back to us (the full moon) and the light of the planet (Solstice). 

Remember to breathe light into your own heart first, then send out little shooting stars of light to others, such as those who light you up, those who've forgotten their light, those struggling or facing life challenges, and light to all beings upon this earth.

May the light in your life shine brightly from within and be reflected back to you. May all beings find connection rather than separation and remember the most powerful and benevolent of forces...love.