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For many years I had one speed...fast. And one intensity...hard. So how has a girl like me become so deeply enamored with restorative yoga? Restorative yoga, as I have been taught, is a deeply healing practice that utilizes props...lots of them (blankets, bolsters, sand bags, belts, chairs, eye covers etc).
It all began when a dear yogini friend of mine named Cheryl said, "I think you'd get a lot out of taking a course in restorative yoga with Judith Hanson Lasater". I've had many endless conversations with Cheryl around everything yoga as we studied yoga therapy together and as a result, a deep and lasting friendship emerged. I trust her and her opinions as I have relatively few people with whom I can be such a yoga geek. If restorative yoga is something that Cheryl valued then I thought I would probably find it valuable as well. So I committed to a four day intensive with Judith.
During those four days Judith said one thing in particular that has stayed with me over the years - during the week between Christmas and New Year's, the only style of yoga she practices is restorative. When the week is over, she said that everything seems more colorful, easier and the world, in general, more peaceful. I quietly thought to myself, "Yeah, right...the world turns into rainbows and unicorns with a bit of restorative yoga." A couple of days later, as I was driving back from San Diego to the desert and passed through some gentle rolling hills, I noticed how lush they were and what a lovely shade of green. I noticed the blue sky and the white puffy clouds. And then I caught myself saying out loud, "It's true! Everything DOES look more beautiful!".
Then the magic started to reveal itself the moment I began using a unique way of supporting the head and neck with a blanket during savasana (the final relaxation in every class). People actually moaned with pleasure as I tucked them in...and they still do after these many years of doing so. What also revealed itself was how deeply healing the practice is and how desperately people need committed downtime to re-set the balance of their bodies, minds and spirits from an over-scheduled and full life.
And then there's the transformational moments that happen. Just today, I asked a relatively new student to the practice how it was going for her coming to class twice a week. She said that having been in constant pain for several months, falling out of shape and becoming more distanced from her body was a real concern. She felt she was pointed in the direction of an electric wheel chair to cope with daily pain and discomfort. Now, she's back to walking and doing a stationary bicycle, along with her restorative yoga. But, she said "It's been the yoga that has pointed me in the right direction. I've completely turned around how I felt, I have hope and am managing my pain like I haven't for a long time. It's enabled me to become more active with the walking and cycling. It's amazing."
I tried not to act too surprised in hearing her experience, but I couldn't help but feel my heart expand. Some of us need restorative yoga because we've always had the default speed of hard and fast. Others need it because they have crazy busy lives and must step out of it for a while and finally, others step into the practice because they've been in physical or emotional pain that at times seemed beyond a turning point.
I've always said if you can breathe, you can do yoga. But if you want to alter your nervous system and create better balance in your lifestyle, then perhaps restorative yoga is for you.
Still not convinced? Come give it a try and let your body, mind and soul do the talking. You might just hear yourself say, "ahhhh"
It's once again that time of year where we are prompted and incentivized from a retail perspective to declare our love (or like if it's early stages) to someone special around us. Valentine's Day is upon us. Cards, flowers and chocolate if you're following the usual route but perhaps this is the year you've colored outside the lines and done something different. If so, please send me a reply as to what it was that you were inspired to do for your beloved.
Being a time of the year when we a drawn into thinking about love and heart shapes, I am compelled to share my thought of the week around the energy of the heart. If you take a moment and center your awareness into your heart, notice what's present. Do you connect with its beat? Do you have a strong emotion such as love, grief or melancholy? Do you sense that this is where your soul lives? Do you feel your breath?
Simply notice what comes up when you focus your attention here. And recognize that what you sense in this moment is most likely to shift. When I was falling in love with my beloved Ed, my heart felt like it was flying out of my chest. A popping of excitement seemed obvious to me and perhaps to others as my new love felt radiant and expansive. When our dog Yindi passed away, it felt as though an elephant had sat on my chest. The feeling was one of such heavy grief, I wondered if I would ever be free of it.
My point is that our emotional heart changes with the ebb and flow of our dynamic lives. Yet, there is something that is lying below the emotional sensibility of the heart and it's an energetic current. I'm not referring to the electrical activity within the heart that can be detected on an EKG (although that alone is a nothing short of miraculous). I'm referring to the energetic body, that esoteric aspect of our being that can be described as prana or chi energy.
The heart has major meridians that run from it out through our arms and to our hands. You can close your eyes and draw your attention to the sensation of a buzz, heat, pulsation or tingling emanating from the heart center outwards. When I do this I most definitely get a buzzing sensation that can amplify the more I focus on its energy.
And think of the many things we do to express love through the use of our arms and hands. This expression is seen as we prepare food for ourselves and others; reach out to "lend a helping hand"; giving and receiving a hug; holding hands; writing a love letter; gently pushing a child on a swing; digging into the soil to plant a garden; playing patty-cake with a child; caressing someone's face or body; and blowing a kiss.
All of these acts involving our hands and arms are nothing but pure expressions of love. Reach out and hug someone. Squeeze them tightly so that the energy of your heart connects and melds with the energy or theirs. We've all had the experience of that unspoken connection and this Valentine's Day is a great opportunity to launch yourself into doing more of it.
Your heart and soul will thank you!
Bring the image of a snow globe into your mind and see the snowflakes swirling around in a flurry. It might be an easy image for those folks living in the Midwest and Northeast of the United States as we sit in the deep snows of winter. This past week I had this image as I came into contact with hundreds of tennis players who checked in for matches at our annual, ASICS World Tennis Classic event. Some were calm but many were in this pre-match state of heightened nervousness, as if they each were their own snow globe that had been madly shaken.
All of us live in our own worlds which are often much like an agitated snow globe. In our culture it's common to have constant motion with people being incredibly scheduled so much so that at times our own snow globes seem to generate their own scene of white out inside. We can't see what's below the agitation because the activity spreads a layer over everything. We become unconscious of what's driving us from a deeper level. And you can sense the level of agitation by watching people's energy and movement. It appears as though most of us have some type of movement nearly all of the time. Our flakes are active, often softly floating about and at times, completely a-buzz.
I had this experience the first two days of the tennis tournament. I felt a bit cranky and short on patience. I was missing my desired state of Zen coolness, recognizing that small things seemed to be bothering me more than was warranted. My snow globe had been shaken.
It wasn't until the next morning, when I finally sat quietly in stillness during my meditation did I realize WHY I was agitated. It dawned on me that although I had much happening, minor but constant earthquakes, it wasn't until I sat still did I have insight and clarity. It was the sitting still, the settling of the snowflakes where I was able to uncover what had been triggering me and in doing so, I was able to shift from a state of being bothered into a state of looking at things from a more loving-kindness perspective.
When I got to the tournament desk that morning, I saw with fresh eyes and could recognize the generosity, noble intent and enthusiasm of the many faces surrounding me. My snow globe offered a new landscape and although it had many moments of action and agitation throughout the week, insight and clarity were available when I let the snow settle.
If we expand this image, it's in moments of being quiet where we have the greatest transformative realizations. How often during your day do you pull your focus to your inner landscape away from the outward focus of daily living? It' s in the regular practice of coming to our center that we can navigate the rocky and prickly moments with greater ease and grace. Without my meditation practice I might have stayed with the cranky energy throughout the week which ultimately wouldn't have served me or those around me. It basically made it a more enjoyable experience from many perspectives.
Let it snow...let it snow...let it snow. And then enjoy the white pristine stillness of such inner and outer beauty.
Early on in my yoga teacher training we were taught to welcome the class and invite them to "Let go of competition, judgment and expectation". To this very day, I still pull upon those ideas of coming to the mat with the intention of being fully present and connected to ourselves without comparing ourselves to our neighboring practitioners. People have also commented that they were too self-conscious to come to a class for fear of looking foolish or being unable to keep up. My hope is that everyone can find their way into a yoga practice and it saddens me to hear that people might not feel "good enough" to do so.
I try to encourage people to give it a go because when we get into our own practice very few people (other than the instructor) are paying that much attention to what we're doing. If we are well taught, our focus turns inward not giving us much room to be thinking about someone else's practice.
Yet, as I've been watching the Australian Tennis Open these past few days, I have had immense inspiration from the positive competitive spirit. It has been well demonstrated by the likes of Roger Federer, Li Na, Rafael Nadal and Eugenie Bouchard. They are completely focused on the present moment, of hitting the next shot and moving on to what's next. It is said that great tennis players have very short memories, minimizing their focus on past mistakes and bringing it to what needs to happen now. And times exist when they've had their backs up against the wall, where the fragile next point is the difference between staying in the tournament or going out with a loss. You can see them stay with their ritual, take a deep breath and continue with focused precision.
When I watch high level performance, it re-connects me to my inner competitor. I grew up being a competitive athlete-softball, volleyball, soccer, diving, track and field and gymnastics. Being on the competitive stage was a normal part of my life. I left competitive sports for a while until I started playing competitive tennis in my late 30's which re-ignited my inner competitive athlete. I wanted to do well, improve and win. So how did I come to a happy place between the completely non-competitive yoga paradigm and the highly competitive (somewhat self-imposed) world of tennis?
I don't know if I ever completely did reconcile the two. I'd be on the tennis court and the alter-ego (the out of control, frustrated and angry competitor) would surface. I'd even surprise myself in my outbursts of frustration, thinking, "With all the yoga you do, who IS that person who acts as though you've never heard of such a thing?". On a particular day of frustration during a tennis tournament, my alter ego appeared. My doubles partner asked the same question, "With all the yoga you practice, where does this come from?". I answered, "There's this fire breathing dragon that seems to dwell deep within. When she gets frustrated, she bursts out of control to the surface and roars". So, my wise friend replied, "We all have them. How about we name ours?", which we did.
In doing so I now recognize a yogic practice of pulling something out of the shadow and into the light. By naming my angry dragon, I began to give her less power. It didn't mean that she didn't appear, but as soon as she began to blow smoke out of her nostrils I would greet her and ask her to either back down or give me just a little boost. I made friends with my dragon and she no longer ruled my queendom.
So I am grateful for seeing the beauty of professional athletes who harness their energy in order to benefit rather than defeat their performance. And I am grateful that I can step onto a yoga mat and not give an iota of energy to competing with anyone, including myself.
Just the right dose seems to do the trick in satisfying both ends of the spectrum. Game, set, match.
The other morning on my drive to work. I had about a 30-minute commute and was in that early morning daze, in the flow of somewhat busy traffic. My thoughts changed direction when I got behind a car with the license plate MAXD OUT. "Maxed out?" I said out loud.
Was the driver one of those compulsive shoppers who maxes out their credit cards and then has an intervention where caring friends and family step in with a pair of scissors to cut them up? Was the person's name Max or Maxine? Had they reached the total number of kids they felt able to manage? Or was their life so busy that they can't take on anything else?
In my projection, I chose the last one...that life was at its limit and no more could be had. Now that may not be the motivation behind this particular personalized plate, but it got me thinking, "Am I maxed out? Have I ever been maxed out? And would I recognize it when I actually WAS at my maximum limit?".
Often when we push ourselves over long periods of time, our body is the first thing that slams the "maxed out mentality" out of us. It lets us know in not so subtle ways to either slow down or I'll put you down by allowing those germs waiting in the wings to take hold. Another indication of being maxed out are signs of disinterest, resentment and boredom. We go through the motions, we get things done, but the enthusiasm and ability to remain connected to the process is greatly diminished. We almost literally drag ourselves through the day, to plop exhausted into bed at night and begin the cycle all over again in the morning.
As I write this, unfortunately, it all sounds a bit familiar. I have found myself on the edge of exhaustion. I have been slammed down by illness. I have had moments of wishing I were heading to Hawaii rather than into the yoga studio. Yet, I hope these forays to the edge have taught me to use my tools to look after myself. Those two potent words...self care.
So when I feel that I'm stepping in the direction of maxing out my energy stores, I try a few of the following things:
*Keep with my morning ritual, even if it means shortening its length.
*Find ways to have "restorative niches" (a term coined by Susan Cain in the book, Quiet)
*Practice things that are nurturing, like enjoying a cup of herbal tea, getting a pedicure or taking a few minutes outside to do nothing but be.
*And most importantly, get enough sleep. When I don't have enough, when I've over-committed it always catches up with me. This means saying "no" to things on occasion including social gatherings and events.
Perhaps this has inspired you to get a new personalized plate that says, "Peasful" or "AT EASE". Let it send a signal not only to yourself but to those driving behind you!
Balance...that's one of the primary themes of a yoga practice. I'm not talking about being able to hold your tree pose for long periods of time but about keeping our individual energy needs in check.
I'm also not talking about energy in the form of calories...we've all heard that to "maintain our weight, we need to take in as much energy in the form of calories as our body needs". They even have energy measuring devices on cardio equipment so you can see how many calories it takes to stride on your elliptical trainer for 20 minutes.
What I'm referring to is the vital energy that is housed in our bodies, the same energy that flows throughout the greater universe. This energy, Prana, is a current that penetrates through our physical selves, our thinking minds and our spiritual being. We notice if this energy balance is out of whack when we over commit to things outside of us and under commit to keeping ourselves in good health.
We say yes to helping a friend, sitting on a committee, hosting an event or babysitting a child. All noble and loving acts...but in addition to all that we're already doing, we might be stretching ourselves a bit thin. We don't have enough reserve at the end of the day to meet more than our basic needs. Where's the time for you if you're always looking after things outside of you?
Many of us have had the experience where we push ourselves and slide right past the point where we need to say "no more" but keep going regardless. For short periods of time this is often easily managed but what if your m.o. is always turned to that switch? What if taking time for yourself feels like a luxury rather than a necessity?
Now is a great time to reflect on what you do to support your own needs. What are you doing to move and enjoy the power of your body? How many moments in the day do you notice how your breath is moving in and out of your lungs? Do you have at least 10 minutes in a day where you're not interrupted, asleep or connected to an electronic device? Do you think about how the food you eat is becoming part of your body? Is it nourishing you in the way you desire? Are you connecting to people who love and support you? Are you learning something new?
I was inspired to write about this topic because I'm about to embark on a very intense 12-day work stint. It's great on so many levels as part of it includes teaching in my yoga school yet I know that by day 12 my inner voice goes from a quiet whisper to a louder shout of "take time for yourself next weekend!".
So, I'm planning on not planning too much. Perhaps some time with family and friends, good tea and green juices. Sunshine. Bicycling. No alarm clock. Morning meditation. A restorative pose for 20 minutes.
Ahhhh...back in balance.
The cycle is self evident...we take a breath in and we breathe out. It happens millions of times throughout our life and each and every time it's an example of my thought for the week, that of beginning again.
Perhaps this is the time of year we think more about what's next as we flip the calendar from 2013 to 2014. This time of the year many are asking themselves a familiar question: "What is my New Year's Resolution?" Is this the year that whatever has been sitting on my to-do list finally makes it off the list and into manifestation?
We ring in the New Year often with great expectations and find ourselves in a puddle of disappointment that whatever it was that felt so compelling at midnight on January 1, seems to have fizzled just like our glasses of champagne. The oomph is gone and we are back in the dance with the familiar. Do we really need to change that much?
As I have written in the past regarding the New Year, I want to honor what has evolved and acknowledge how it came about. Often, we are ready to let go of things before their time, thinking that the grass might be greener if we do. Take a moment to consider ONE thing that you've added into your life this past year that has made it unquestionably better. That one thing began as an inclination that something needed to change and you stepped onto a path of creating that change. And now...here you are in the present moment with what now seems to be quite a normal part of your life, although it didn't begin that way.
I'm all for living in the present moment and practice it daily. But I also recognize how our past is a magnificent teacher. If we're paying attention to our actions and how they echo first within and then beyond us, we begin to become better attuned to what is truly working. It's a dynamic process that will forever be unfolding, yet I hope that with acknowledging what's working that I get more efficient at finding out what's worth keeping and what is not.
And this leads me back to my thought for the week, beginning again. As we travel along our own path of self-discovery and transformation, many of us use the practices of yoga, meditation, prayer and contemplation. These practices are all part of us peeling back our layers of illusion which are fraught with endless stories of self-doubt, judgment, criticism and expectation. We also learn that when we cling to our stories, we move away from the direction we desire and sit in the lap of suffering. So, we begin again.
When we notice that we have grabbed onto a thought and followed its wild ride, it's in THAT moment that we begin again, that we recognize this as the opportunity to let go. We can come back to the moment, we can come back to THIS breath, to this very inhale and this very next exhale. We may have to do this 700,000 times in our practice because that IS the journey of surrendering.
With that being said, my intention for this moment, which just happens to be the new year of 2014 is to begin again...over and over and over again. When I come back to that place of the beginning, I have nothing but spaciousness and in that spaciousness, there is no suffering.
Begin again.
